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The Privacy Invasion Collection

Mental Health Consumer Educators @ E.W.U.

In this video, I explain what all consumer educators for Eastern Washington University’s Occupational Therapy Program do to help educate their students and destigmatize mental illness for their students.

Myra St. Clair Baldwin, Consumer Educator for E.W.U.

Transcript:

Hi everyone, my name is Myra St. Clair Baldwin and I’m a Consumer Educator for Eastern Washington University’s Occupational Therapy Program.

The E.W.U. Occupational Therapy program put together a panel and Q&A session as part of an eight-session program in which eight people in recovery from mental illness, including myself, will be working with students in the program.

When I arrived at the orientation classroom, the instructor’s assistant gave us some paperwork to fill out and sign, which I completed. Then we learned more about what we’d be doing. The sessions last about two to three hours each. The next two sessions after the panel discussion, three students who I’ll be working with the rest of the quarter will be practicing doing an assessment on me, which should be interesting. So long as I don’t have brain fog from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, then I believe I’ll ace any cognitive tests they give me. I’ll let you know later how I did. The panel discussion and Q&A itself was in front of an audience of about 30 or 40 students. The two sessions following the assessments are in the Spokane community, at the locations of our choosing. I plan to show the students I’m working with the Huntington Park, down by the Spokane River, behind the city hall for one session. For another session, I plan to show them a subsect of downtown, starting with the apartment building above Boo Radley’s novelty shop and Atticus Coffeehouse, where I thought I was spied on. I will also be showing them the bus plaza and the construction for the new downtown library, letting them know what amazing features the new library is going to have, which will include a video recording studio, a music recording studio, and a broadcasting studio, all of which will be available to be checked out by the public. I may get to do this job again in future years and might book a tour with the students of the new downtown library after it reopens, as that would be exciting! There’s a couple more sessions after that, including a session about completing a discharge plan and ending with a presentation the students give that we’re invited to. I plan to wear my t-shirt for mine & my partners’ blog “The Deep End Northwest” to one of the assessments as well as to the student presentations, in the hopes that the students will decide to take a peek at our blog out of curiosity.

After the orientation, we were escorted to the classroom where the students were. It was a small classroom, but the class was jam-packed. There wasn’t one empty desk. I went first, so I could get it done and over with, as I was anxious. This ended up being a good idea, because it freed me to listen more intently to the other panelists, whose stories were powerful. Although I knew most of them, I wasn’t familiar with their stories. Even though I was nervous, I think I did all right. Not perfect, but I don’t have a lot of experience yet on stage, so my talk wasn’t bad, considering. I ended up having to catch my breath a few times during the speech, but I wasn’t as anxious as I had expected.

After we each spoke, there was a Q&A. I managed to make the students laugh a couple of times, which reminded me that I sometimes have a sense of humor, which is what helped me survive the alleged privacy invasion that I endured. After the questions, the instructor said we were free to do a meet & greet with the students, but I was dying to go pee, and blurted out “I…I gotta take a leak!” That made the students laugh. There’s a backstory to why I now say “I gotta take a leak” rather than “I need to use the bathroom” or “I gotta go pee.” I’ll save that story for another day.

It’s really cutting edge what the instructor is doing, having some of us in mental health recovery work with the students. It helps humanize mental illness for the students. It’s an invaluable and cost-effective way for the students to “get it.” We each get paid $300 for the full contract. It was the instructor’s idea back in 2007, and there’s only a few universities now doing it. She’s presented at conferences and tried to sell others on how cost-effective it is and how it helps destigmatize mental illness for the students but hasn’t gotten a lot of buy-in yet. Perhaps in time, more universities will implement similar programs.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

My #1 Issue & Action Plan

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

This is the agenda I came up with based on the SOLVED application, a Dialectical Behavioral Therapy tool for problem solving. My problem is that I believe I was spied and subjected to torture, and I want justice. I discussed this agenda with my counselor, who seemed supportive.

  1. Continue to work on my case report. Demonstrate a motive. Show the who, what, when, where, and why. Examine the character and history of some of my alleged spies.
  2. Work on systematic desensitization with Stephanie A.
  3. Prove my competencies to others and document them in my case report. Look for opportunities to build and demonstrate competencies, especially in the areas of written communication, oral communication, relationship-building, collaboration, organizing, and other tasks. Demonstrate ability to organize thoughts, offer editing advice (which I did for the EGC self-study), etc.
    1. Presentations for The Evergreen Club (EGC):
      1. Present to the Spokane Homeless Coalition.
      1. Present to other area agencies and civic organizations.
      1. Perform speaking tours for the EGC in which I share parts of my personal story (although there will be parts of my story that I WON’T be sharing publicly).
    1. Consumer Educator Position for the Eastern Washington University (E.W.U.) occupational therapy program (limited, contractual employment).
    1. Publications @ EGC.
    1. Writing group (when I’m ready).
    1. Eventually: Work with Spokane group MAC (first focus on other committee work and presentations for EGC).
    1. Gain competency on speaking both through practice, and by learning speaking skills.
  4. Show my case report to other individuals and ask them if they believe I was possibly subject to a real spy operation. Ask for a letter indicating whether or not they believe it’s possible I really was spied on, including talking points discussing their opinion with supportive evidence. Ask Stephanie A, MJ @ EGC, Laurel @ EGC, Rex @ EGC, Diana @ EWU, Rachael A., Chris Snell, Elaine Terdal, Elizabeth Ross, Orion Moon, Sean McKelvey, Kristen, agencies, reporters, and journalists. Have a sit-down meeting with Stephanie A, MJ of EGC, Laurel White of EGC, Rexanne of EGC, as well a couple of counselors who believed it was possible that I was spied on, to review my case report and interview me.
  5. Collect letters of support.
  6. Show my case report along with letters of support to a legal team and ask that they further investigate by looking into phone calls and talking to people. Ask them if they can hire a psychologist or psychiatrist with a PhD to sit down with me, review my case report and my medical records to determine if they believe it was possible that I was spied on.
  7. Address anxiety about potential publicity by seeking moral support from others. Gradually share more of my story to certain individuals and in group (though asking my group leaders not to document everything I share). Ask agencies that will be sympathetic to my cause for moral support as well if/when my case goes to trial and during any potential publicity via the press and social media that results.
  8. During times of negative publicity (assuming there is negative publicity), reach out to people who have pledged moral support.
  9. Be sure to celebrate my progress including small action steps towards my goal. Post my celebrations on Facebook.
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The Privacy Invasion Collection

My Multi-Pronged Strategy

Here is the strategy I presented to my counselor at Frontier Behavioral Health today. She didn’t have any suggestions for improvement. She never tells me I’m schizophrenic when I present stuff like this to her, and she seems supportive of my desire to pursue justice and have my case properly investigated.

The Evergreen Club and my position as a Consumer Educator for E.W.U. (limited contractual work) will provide me with opportunities to develop and demonstrate many competencies, which will be important in building my case report and in gaining letters of support from others who believe me, which I will be presenting to a legal team along with the case report. The case report will explain the who, what, when, where, and why of the alleged spy operation, as well as explore the character and history of a few of my prime suspects, plus show many of my competencies that are outside the norm for someone with a diagnosis of schizophrenia.

 I will especially be seeking out opportunities to develop and demonstrate competency in presenting, writing, editing, organizing, collaborating, and communicating, showing organized thought as well as demonstrating critical thinking skills. At the Evergreen Club, I am engaging in committee work, will be giving club tours, in which I will share my personal story (just parts of it as there is stuff that I won’t be opening up about publicly when I represent the Evergreen Club), will plan and prepare presentations to other organizations, including the Spokane Homeless Coalition and civic organizations.

I offered editing advice a recent self-study at the Evergreen Club, a study that we must routinely submit to Clubhouse International to keep our accreditation.  I prepare Power-Point presentations and Facebook posts for The Evergreen Club, as well as do front desk work and some other work as needed and as my mood or energy level dictates.

Furthermore, I plan to run a book club for the book Their Eyes Were Watching God, engage in writing and sharing with the Drop in & Write group through Spark Central (although that’s currently on hold as I need to do more work on anxiety & developing my competency at written communication & vocabulary), and later on in the future I plan to work with the Spokane organization Music, Art, & Creativity (MAC). That’s on hold as well as I have lots of other work to do before I get to that, plus need to gradually work on systematic desensitization before I’m ready to participate.

Furthermore, I will be planning on how to cope with a stressful court battle and potential publicity. I will gain the verbal support of other agencies by sending them my case report along with letters of support to various agencies who might be sympathetic to my cause and have my back.

Gaining support will provide me with other individuals and agencies to reach out to when I am in heightened states of distress during the potential court case along with any potential negative publicity from the press and social media that arises as a result of pursuing legal action.

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Uncategorized

Chasing the Police

On the way to the bus stop, following my counseling appointment, I came across a couple of police on bicycles, who were riding around in the parking lot of Seven Eleven, at the corner of 2nd Avenue & Division in Spokane, Washington. As I continued to walk, they started following some guy. They didn’t seize the guy or force him on the ground or anything, but they were trying to direct him to turn. So, I decided to follow and make sure the cops didn’t get violent, as the guy was totally nonviolent. I had to keep turning the corner to follow them, and at some point I had to run a little, in my denim skirt with a bell-shaped bottom which folded up in the middle, my lavender long-sleeved hippy shirt w/ a couple of buttons, my green and white flowered bandana tied around my head like a headband, and my big red-framed sunglasses and mask blocking my face (it was 50’s, 60’s, & 70’s day at The Evergreen Club). I kept up for a while and happened upon my niece Katie’s x-boyfriend Justin, who I had seen earlier in the day on my way to the counseling appointment, on a litter-filled street near the mental health buildings and the House of Charity shelter for men. So, I stopped to say hello to Justin. I don’t know how he recognized me earlier in the day, come to think of it, underneath the mask and the sunglasses. He must have recognized my voice. He had asked to buy a cigarette earlier and I offered to give him one. He said he liked my outfit. Then he said, “Are you Myra?” and I was like “Yeah.” I didn’t recognize him immediately. I hadn’t seen him since maybe 2012 when him and Katie were together and lived with me and my ex-boyfriend Adam for a month, so I was like “Who are you?” He said “Justin.” I was like, oh wow, Katie’s ex-boyfriend. He was doing some work on his old car and his hands were all greasy. He presents as super nice, but this guy, when he got back into meth years ago, he got to the point where he was selling black-market AK47s. So, you know, he’s kinda dangerous. I wasn’t afraid of him though. The way it works on the street, generally, is that so long as you don’t fuck with someone, they won’t fuck with you. Now, narcing on someone is dangerous. That can get you beat up or even killed. But Justin was being nice and pleasant and had no reason to fuck with me, so I wasn’t afraid. And he didn’t seem manic or anything. If he was on drugs, I couldn’t tell. Anyway, when I saw him earlier, I didn’t say much as I told him I had to hurry off to my appointment. About 1 ½ hours later, when I coincidentally saw him again, I stopped and chatted for a bit. I told him I had been following the police to make sure they didn’t hurt anyone. If they did, I planned to film it. That’s how George Floyd’s perpetrator got busted. It was all caught on tape. So, I told Justin this, and told him to keep an eye on the cops. He said he would. He told me that a man outside the House of Charity had gotten shot by a police officer 17 times, after pulling out some sword or something. Yeah, so that guy died. There was nothing to see today, however. No news is good news! Anyway, the 2nd time I saw Justin, he started talking about his car and some car part. That’s when he lost me, and it was hot outside, and I was sweating in my long-sleeve blouse, so I told him I had to jet off to catch my bus. I went to the wrong bus stop (the bus was on detour), but I did see the police circling around in some parking lot. Then I caught the bus and that was the end of my adventure. I guess I’m not much of a street journalist, because there was nothing to report! Oh, but I did do my TOTALLY brave thing for the day, my “alternate rebellion” as they say in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy treatment for treating addiction.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

The Big Important Scary Thing…

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

So, the big important thing I’m going to be doing in the next several weeks is – I wish it was abolishing capitalism, but no, that’s over my head – is preparing a document to present to a legal team that makes a compelling argument that my privacy rights were violated, that I was put through psychological torture, and that I was a victim of a hate crime. Putting this document together and preparing to speak to a legal team is anxiety-inducing, so I’m going to be working with therapists and am going to try what’s known as “systematic desensitization.” I’ve already started the process of desensitization by sharing parts of my story publicly on Facebook and on my blog. I’m also participating in a public group outside the safety of the mental health community, though I haven’t shared a lot yet with them about my personal story, but it is a writing group, and I will be writing about myself, and sharing parts of it. I ended up in pain from the anxiety last time I was in group, and I’m going to have to embrace some physical pain as I expose myself to triggers. So long as I understand what’s causing the pain, so I don’t freak out about the pain and end up in extra bad pain from health anxiety, I’ll manage. And I have Xanax I can take when it gets really bad. If I get the publicity I’m pursuing, I could end up in severe pain for a few days when news breaks out. But I’ll have supporters I can lean on. I can call First Call for Help if I need to. I can take Xanax and practice coping techniques. I’ll be learning and reviewing lots of coping strategies in the next several weeks as I plan to attend group therapy at Frontier Behavioral Health. So, I will be arming myself with solid steel armor. And I will be taking lots of busy breaks to distract myself from all of this as well. What I won’t be doing much of is resting as that just increases my anxiety because I spend my resting time thinking and overthinking stuff, which really isn’t restful at all. Sometimes I sleep well, and sometimes my sleep is shitty. I’ll just have to deal with it. btw, I’m reading “Fight Club” which is one of my many distractions right now. Got other projects going on at The Evergreen Club. I might be at risk of going overboard, which I have a history of doing, but I’m trying to stay as busy and preoccupied as possible when not spending time constructively addressing my “situation.”

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

This is My Revenge

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

My neck muscles are all knotted up. My nerves through-out my fascia are whining obnoxiously, like a children’s choir. But I’ve got to do this. I’ve GOT to! This is my revenge. I must teach them a lesson if it kills me! I could get tied down at the stake and burned alive, a human roast. I might get tortured first. But I want them to wake up one day; fully wake up to the realization of “Oh my God, what have I done?” I want that to sink in, deep down into their bones. I want every ounce of fiber in their entire body singing my song in a squealing voice, laden with a high-pitched synthesizer sound. I want their stomach muscles tight and achy much as mine, and I want them to feel so sick to their stomach that they vomit puke-green slime. I want them to cry out to the great heavens, begging forgiveness for what they have done; for what I have had to endure.

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Consumer Behavior

Everywhere is Far by Bus

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

I had to go back to the cellphone repair shop, because having the new microphone placed on my smartphone replaced didn’t do the trick. The repair shop wasn’t far away, but when you have to take the bus around, every place feels far away. You have to wait outside in in the snow, the rain, during allergy season; even during record heat waves followed by wildfire season which means poor air quality. I would have had to take only one bus to get there, but then I would have had to wait for up to 30 minutes to catch the bus coming back.

Now some people are big on the idea of shopping local and shopping small, but most of them have cars. Try shopping small and having to take multiple buses all over the way to buy different things. Also, you have to bring a shopping cart with you, and the bus driver might make you fold it up before boarding, which is a hassle. A packed bus will sometimes drive by someone with a cart full of groceries or someone in a wheelchair due to insufficient space.

I’m not saying all this to scare you away from riding the bus. We absolutely all need to get on the bus! Our planet is dying. Billions of creatures and lots of people are dying! There’s a reason though why I prefer to shop along the bus route and take only one, maybe two buses, despite believing in the idea of “going local.” Of course, nonlocal food travels an average of 1500 miles from the farm to your plate, so maybe I’m not doing the world a favor by not having a car. Not that I can afford a car or all local, organic food on my budget, anyway.

Luckily, I do live near a local corner store. But this corner store mostly sells nonlocal liquor, tobacco, junk food, and soda – so they’re not to be idealized by any means. I do support them, though. I sadly have a tobacco addiction, plus I like an occasional beer or two (and they do have decent beer for cheap). But by no means are they great role models as they cash in on our addictions. If cocaine were legal, they’d cash in on that too.

I’m actually for the decriminalization of drugs due to the violent nature of our war on drugs and due to people having to spend so much time behind bars due to their addictions. But at the same time, I don’t necessarily like people profiting off of our addictions. It’s no different than cashing in on our shopping addictions, our eating addictions, our gambling addictions, and our addiction to oil. Though honestly, some people get by only because they sell drugs, due to their own tragic addictions or due to socioeconomic factors and/or other factors can block other opportunities in a land where there’s almost always an unemployment rate (which provides employers with a ready labor pool of people desperate for jobs). Only lately do we have a shortage of employees, which is making for more favorable working conditions for those looking for jobs.

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Religion & Politics The Privacy Invasion Collection

Fuck Yeah, I’m Civil Rights Minded!

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

Six years ago, someone wanted to know if I was civil rights minded. I didn’t understand why she was asking that. But now I get it! I finally made the mental connection. And YES, actually, I AM civil rights minded, and that should TERRIFY her to death. In fact, I hope she loses sleep at night over it!  I’m civil rights minded to the CORE. She and others put the wrong person to the test! I WILL speak out. I WILL sue! I WON’T cower to any intimidation tactics. I am STRONG. I may be suffering from anxiety-related pain, but that’s not going to stop me! I learned about some strong people in my classes at Eastern Washington University and I KNEW people who were strong and proud. I absorbed their strength. I didn’t know what I was going to do with it, but I wanted to do something to help create a better world. I focused on the environment for a while. I focused on antiwar protesting for a while. But it wasn’t until this THING happened to me, that my true colors really shined. THIS was it, my big test, to see if I could stand my ground and to see if I would resist or follow the path of least resistance. This inner battle continued on after the event, as well as the question remained: how would I share my experience without sounding like I’d totally checked out of reality for a long minute? Or trying to explain the “why” of why they did this to me. They had their reasons. They had legitimate reasons, but that’s not an excuse for what they did. I won’t say at this point what their reasons were. But trust me, they had their reasons.

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Religion & Politics The Privacy Invasion Collection

Remember, Psychological Torture is Against International Law!!!

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

When I learned about triggers in a Frontier Behavioral Health group, I thought the point of us learning about triggers is so that we could AVOID triggers, but apparently, it’s so we can be better equipped to handle our triggers. I want to go into public speaking but am imagining bad-case scenarios and of course the worst-case scenario imaginable. There is not much I can do to prepare for the worst case, which would involve receiving negative publicity and being tortured and burned to death by some crazy white supremacist, except perhaps to prepare to approach it through meditation and guided imagery. I once read about someone who was able to undergo surgery without anesthesia or pain medication because he was THAT effective at meditation. That’s some MAD skillz! I know in anxiety group they warn against “catastrophizing”, but I have good reason to believe that I could be further targeted and become a victim of a hate crime a second time around. I don’t want to back down, though. I SHOULDN’T back down. Others out there that have come before me have braved some insanely serious potential threats but did what they believed was the RIGHT thing to do for the betterment of society, despite the risks. Some have died for what they believed in but didn’t let death threats get the best of them and refused to back down. They died, but they died for a CAUSE. I survived through psychological torture, but physical torture is another beast, and hopefully I won’t have to come face to face with it. Torture should NEVER happen, psychological OR physical. What happened at Abu Ghraib was UNTHINKABLE, regardless of whether any of the suspects were or weren’t terrorists. It was sick and morally repulsive. My alleged spies didn’t use the same exact psychological torture techniques, but it was torture, nonetheless. Torture is against international law. Does that include psychological torture? And what if the torture is done by outlaws and not by the government, as I believe was the case with me? Is it still against international law THEN? Remember, it was in Spokane, WA where there existed the psychologists who were behind the psychological torture interrogation practices experimented with at Abu Ghraib. THEY invented those techniques. Spokane is the city I call home, and it is the very same city I believe I was spied on by a vigilante “justice mob” consisting of primarily neighbors and family who thought up some “lovely” torture techniques of their own to try out on me.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

Introducing Communist Myra Sue of the 2021 “All-American City”

Introducing Myra Sue (Who You Don’t Know…YET!)

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin, manager of The Deep End Northwest (a blog you’ve probably never heard about…YET).

I initially wrote this for The Onion, only to find out that The Onion doesn’t accept contributions from outside writers. I will have to educate myself about publications that DO accept outside contributions. Anyway, this was intended to be funny, even though it’s about a painful experience I underwent. This is written in third person...

Myra Sue from Spokane WA (now labeled the “All American City” reportedly remembers reading an article in the Pacific Northwest Inlander in 2015 (A Spokane weekly newspaper) about someone’s storage getting bought out and treasures being found, such as brochures. This reminded her of her own storage (which had brochures in it) getting bought out, because one of two guys stole her $80 her parents had given her to pay the storage bill she was behind on as well as her bottle of Xanax. She claims she only read this one article, well perhaps another, in all of 2015 because she was busy studying drug culture “experientially.” Despite reading this article in The Inlander, she claimed to be completely unaware of Shar Lichty’s 2015 run for Spokane mayor – even though she reportedly knew Shar Lichty from The Peace and Justice Action League of Spokane – until an alleged spy operation was underway (which, coincidentally started on or around the time of Spokane’s primary election on August 4, 2015”. She alleges one of her alleged spies told her and that is how she found out about Lichty’s run. She said because she was so caught up in “studying” drug culture, she didn’t know what was going on in the world outside. “I was busy studying drug culture like a cultural anthropologist or investigative journalist, plus I was busy scrapping and creating upcycled art from junk plus shuffling my stuff around like a Rubik’s cube to make everything fit so I wouldn’t be evicted for hoarding,” she said. “Then I got spied on by neighbors, apartment management, the maintenance guy, my hateful siblings as well as my hateful ex-husband’s well-to-do family, and a few others. They spied on me because they suspected me of drug abuse and drug-related activity and my neighbors were stalking and harassing suspected drug users and their friends.” She says also that her snobby sister Joyce Pardi’s husband has a close family member who’s retired FBI, and they may have thought she was a potential “terrorist” threat due to identifying as an Anarchist and threatening to anyone within earshot of her while she was talking loudly through her apartment walls that if they (Republicans in general and the apartment management) kept throwing people out on the street without food stamps and housing, then she was going to start a street revolution. She reports saying this so that her apartment manager would think twice about evicting her to avoid the beginning of class war, but that it backfired on her. She claims her alleged spies put her through psychological torture, which is against international law. While you are just now getting acquainted with Myra Sue, she says she plans to go down in history, fighting for the privacy rights of all druggies and suspected druggies. “The 4th Amendment applies to us to and I plan to fight the privacy rights for ALL U.S. citizens; even noncitizens!” While she has yet to make history and have her claims investigated by the media, she plans to write a book about her experience as well as her entire life and use her earnings to hire a private investigator to investigate her case. “I’m not a schizophrenic, and I’m going to prove that!” She’d ultimately like to see her alleged spies get busted.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

My Book Won’t be a Tell-all (Unless I Change my Mind)

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

I edited some of my blog articles on privacy invasion as well as my bio to indicate that the spy operation may have been real or imagined. It was a great pleasure to re-read  my essay “A Carrie Brownstein Wannabe Tries on Different Hats” as it was well written, quirky, and detail-packed.

Whether or not people believe there was a real spy operation, they should find my autobiography intriguing, when I’m done with it. I don’t think it will be a tell-all after all, because I was too traumatized by something to include it in my book and besides, I don’t want the media to get ahold of this tidbit of information on me. Just thinking about the potential for publicity (some of it negative) has put me in a state of severe anxiety, plus has caused me to relive the trauma I experienced. Though, even writing about the spy operation even without that piece of information will still be hard to do. Sorry to disappoint for not letting the cat totally out of the bag, but the media would possibly, totally PULVERIZE me for this secret. Hahaha! I will NEVER tell!

I just LOVE flirting dangerously with the press! But I will NEVER give away the ending!

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Religion & Politics

A Field Guide to the Inland Northwest Far Right

By Orion Moon

In the weeks ahead we’ll examine in depth the local elements and public figures of right-wing movements that have become prominent in the region and nationally. While many of these organizations and causes have roots as deep as the initial European colonization of the Americas, the past decade has been fertile ground for the explosive growth of ideologies built upon religious fanaticism, paranoia, authoritarianism, and white supremacy. The election of the nation’s first Black president and subsequent antidemocratic backlash provoked the public emergence of virulent strains of hatred masquerading as “liberty”. As with any serious disease of the body politic it is important to understand the causes and symptoms alike, and we hope this series helps illuminate for our readers the parasitic growth of these ideologies upon the margins of our communities.

Four essential threads run through contemporary American far right movements, and these are interwoven to the extent that it’s increasingly unlikely to see an individual group or protest in which one of these threads is absent. I’ll introduce each in the sequence they’ll appear over the course of this series:

Christian Nationalism, also referred to as Dominionism, is an increasingly ubiquitous feature of American far right movements, and is a common indicator of participation in movement causes without specific religious aspects. Dominionists operate on the notion that Christ has commanded them to seize the organs of government, law, education, popular culture, and more with the aim of imposing what they view as God’s law upon the United States and ultimately on the entirety of human civilization. This fringe approach to Christianity is generally inconsistent with that of mainstream believers, just as much as the extremist elements of other religious traditions are unrepresentative of those faiths. Dominionist thought and strategy is found among Evangelicals and Roman Catholics alike, and has spread insidiously among low-information believers who often have little understanding of the tenets of their own faith. The corrupt focus on domination, subjugation, confrontation, and even violence appeals to adherents and nonbelievers alike who are attracted to these approaches, and is the primary interconnection with our remaining threads.

Conspiracy Theorism, once called the paranoid style in American politics by Richard Hofstadter, is a burgeoning element of many far right groups. The phenomenal growth of the Trump-centric Qanon (“Q”) movement is effectively exponential, mirroring the development of any number of religions, past or present. The general public climate of the past decade has fostered the growth and popularity of conspiracy theories, loosely defined as (irrational) beliefs in hidden but powerful organizations and individuals which supposedly control and shape the course of human events outside of public view. Declining education, anti-intellectualism, white supremacist backlash to the Obama era, widespread use of social media platforms, the reality-warping presidency of Trump, and ever widening socioeconomic inequality are but a few factors that have helped propagate a new dark age of unreason. Within each of the movements we’ll consider here, at least one significant conspiratorial claim can be found.

In recent years, and especially recent weeks, Americans have witnessed their own government very publicly take on the very attributes and policies of the fascist regimes the nation once ostensibly opposed. While authoritarianism has been present in US society for centuries in quite real and pernicious forms, it is now embraced wholeheartedly by American far right leaders and movements (and the roughly one third of the population supporting them). Numerous quasi-military operations have sprung up in law enforcement and civilian spheres alike, and at the fringes a genuinely seditious movement which hopes to spark a new civil war. The worship of firearms in US society binds these disparate groups as well. Even among the rank-and-file of American police departments, it is all too common to witness open, abhorrent favoritism toward right wing protesters and paramilitaries during public demonstrations. Naturally, these public and institutional authoritarian leanings lead us to the final thread this series will explore.

The vastly overdue conflagration ignited by the brutal murders of Breonna Taylor, George Floyd, and so many other Black citizens has cast a harsh light on the white supremacy that is root and branch of the American right (and much of America itself). Far right movements in the US attempt to disavow their own evident racism on occasion, but of all the ties that bind them this is the oldest and the key. Fear and hatred of others galvanizes and unifies these movements, and behind those raw emotions is the terror that the dominance, power, and privilege conferred by white supremacy will be lost. We hope to in some small way add to the spotlight glare being thrown on racism in this country by examining regional expressions of these behaviors, ideologies, and movements.

Author’s Note:

Misogyny, homophobia, and transphobia are far from beyond the scope of a thorough examination of far right movement attitudes and ideology. The upcoming article focusing on religious aspects of these groups covers these poisonous hatreds in considerable detail. It is worth noting that much like systemic racism, these issues are so prevalent in broader society that they’re very much worth reflecting upon independently.

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Consumer Behavior Drunkcast Show

Kerouac Literature is a Gateway Drug!

Learn to Swim Show, Season 1, Special Edition

Sean P. McKelvey of The Deep End Northwest discusses drug addiction, the Methadone clinic, decriminalization of drugs, and saving someone’s life.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

When I was homeless…

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

I did a lot of journaling when I was homeless. I will need to go back and read my notes when I am ready to write more extensively about being homeless. In a way, I was more privileged than many of the homeless people at the shelter in that I could go back and forth between my parents’ place in the country and the urban shelter located in downtown Washington. I had been through a lot of trauma though due to the spy operation I had been through. Fortunately I had a bus pass and could easily access the mental health system, which included the Evergreen Club where I could do light volunteer work in a comfortable environment and got to participate in groups at Frontier Behavioral Health which included art group. I wasn’t feeling particularly artistically inclined though, as I lost a lot of my creative energy when I went off of uppers. And I went off of the uppers due to the privacy invasion. So I guess that’s the “silver lining” of getting spied on, since my brain’s not going to become eroded by the toxic chemicals in meth, but I’m still angry about the psychological torture I experienced and plan to bring my former spies – including family, family of my exhusband, and former neighbors – to justice.

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Drunkcast Show The Privacy Invasion Collection

Schizophrenia or Privacy Invasion?

Video Clip

Were the privacy rights of Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin of The Deep End Northwest in Spokane, WA violated or did she have a schizophrenic episode? You decide.

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Drunkcast Show The Privacy Invasion Collection

Snitches & Spies

Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin, Sean P. McKelvey, and Orion Moon of The Deep End Northwest discuss snitches and spies.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

Myra Sue’s Nosy Neighbors & Family

Filmed May 6, 2020

Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin explaining why she thought there was a real spy operation against her by neighbors & family as opposed to an imagined one.

Categories
Consumer Behavior Religion & Politics The Privacy Invasion Collection

Get Out of Jail Day

A national holiday in the near future!

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

A friend doesn’t think I should “waste” all my stimulus check on my business, but it’s totally NOT a waste, even if I never make a buck from it. This website has become a real passion for me. It gives me purpose in life, helps me contribute to society, and is creatively fulfilling. It also gives me an opportunity to build a case against some people that I believe really may have spied on me. While I’m no fan of mass imprisonment, I have come to view spies as being on the same level as snitches, and snitches are bitches! I’m willing to put away some spies and let all my many many junkie friends out jail! Including junkie friends I haven’t ever met; not yet! On the day I put some people behind bars, it’s also going to be widely known as the “Get Out of Jail” Holiday for most prisoners and it will be a national holiday to be celebrated forever more! We’ll be celebrating the holiday with organic, non-gmo, union grown, sustainably grown & transported (by bicycle! haha!) government subsidized cocaine (not funded by the CIA as a cash cow, but rather funded primarily by taxing the rich)! Because someday all drugs will be decriminalized and the violent war on drugs will come to a screeching halt! It will be the celebration of our lifetime! We’ll need government PSA’s of course to remind us not to take too much and overdose and not to give any to our dogs or our children (yes, U.S. Americans can be THAT dumb sometimes).

Categories
Consumer Behavior Drunkcast Show Religion & Politics The Privacy Invasion Collection

Drunkcast #2: “Potcast” Podcast

The Deep End Northwest… is a blog covering life, politics, and social issues such as anti-theism vs. religious supremacy, disease, hunger, global climate change & the environment, peace & war, capitalism vs. socialism, big business & worker’s rights, homelessness, mental illness & privacy issues, drug addiction, art, racism, reparations. LBTQA+ issues, gun rights & responsible ownership, legalization & decriminalization of recreational drugs , and more from a leftist perspective.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

Maybe My Alleged Spies Were Right About Me Being Bipolar

Photo by Keenan Constance on Pexels.com

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

I woke up at 12:30 a.m. for the 3rd time today, so I decided to stay up. I did lots and lots of planning and messaged a bunch of people about upcoming projects that we (The Deep End Northwest) need help with. Now I’m tired and I have laundry and chores to do. I didn’t do them in the middle of the night because we’re not allowed to use the laundry room in the middle of the night and we have to be super quiet at night (or early morning as I usually call it), so I sat down and did some journaling and started thinking about upcoming projects for The Deep End blog because I just heard back from a couple of people yesterday; one that’s on board and wants to do some creative work, and one that’s potentially interested and has an idea for what she wants to write; they both have ideas for what they want to write as a matter of fact. So I was really excited and it took awhile to fall asleep despite the sleeping pills.

Anyway, I’m excited about the projects and have mental energy, but don’t have physical energy and the attention span to pay attention to chores I’m doing. I don’t know if lots of mental energy constitutes being “manic” because I’m lacking in physical energy. So usually on my mental health questionnaires I write 0 for being manic because I’m not running around doing chores with lots of manic energy. But maybe mental energy counts. I don’t always understand the questions on these questionnaires. And why do they ask if you’re interested in being a reporter or interested in drama? I mean, I really like dramatic theatre plays a lot, when I can afford to go (which isn’t often). And I really would love to be an underground journalist, though I struggle with finding the time to read the news because my brain keeps coming up with lots and lots of ideas. Too many ideas and I can’t do all that work because I run out of steam.

I have a HUD inspection on Monday morning, so I really have to get it together and get this place in tip-top shape!

Maybe my alleged spies were right about me being bipolar; although they were definitely wrong about me having Multiple Personality Disorder. And I find it kind of curious that they were calling me dramatic and an underground reporter – it’s like as if they had looked over my test scores for a mental health questionnaire I had filled out in which I indicated that I did indeed like drama and was interested in being a journalist or reporter.

I’m scheduling time to recover (and not do chores) for two days following our next big event. I got to remember to ask my counselor if maybe I’m bipolar. I was trying not to get going on any projects for the last several years, because I was given the diagnosis of “Chronic Fatigue Syndrome” and “Fibromyalgia” so I was really trying hard to pace myself and not over-do it. But I really want to be working on these projects now. And I don’t want medications for bipolar disorder because they’ll hinder my creativity!

Well I was finally diagnosed with ADD (the quiet form of ADHD) so that could possibly explain some of this.

Categories
The Privacy Invasion Collection

Update: Corn Gods / When Spy-op Began

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

Update:

Update: The alleged spy operation started between 8/10/20 and 8/19/20; possibly sooner. I just called the hospital today (June 16, 2020) to check on my admission date, remembering that it was sometime in August of 2020. The medical records department said it was August 19, 2020, which would have been nine days after 8/10/20 (the date when I messaged my ex-boyfriend’s friend who studied film production with an idea for a film about space alien GMO corn Gods colonizing the planet).

On 8/19/20 I checked myself into the hospital overnight. One of my alleged spies told me there was poison in my tobacco, that I had 5 days to live, and that I needed to go to the hospital. I realized when I was in the E.R. room that they wouldn’t be able to check me for all possible poisons. I later suspected that the alleged spy must have been pulling my leg, to get me to check myself in at the hospital, and to make me appear to be schizophrenic. When I arrived back home, I thought some of my spies had raided my apartment and taken photos and copied some documents.

It was after 8/10/15 that the alleged spy operation started, because I had emailed a friend about wanting someone to produce a film about some GMO alien corn gods that were colonizing our planet (a story I made up). I just found that message in my Messenger account today. It was also around the time that my great nephew Parker was born. My mother had called me and said that my nephew Marcus and his wife had a baby and said I should call them. I didn’t call them because I was really freaked out by the belief that my privacy was being invaded at the time.

Below is the message I wrote to my X-boyfriend’s friend, Tim Mattson (who works with an acting group in New York and produces skits & ads). The grammar and spelling are poor because I was writing fast, was on drugs (I think), and also my smart-phone was auto-correcting. I was going through a period of heightened creativity at the time and feeling very ambitious!

I never told Tim the whole story about the Alien GMO corn gods. I never wrote the whole story down. However, I just remembered that in the story the aliens were not only colonizing the planet, but they were also colonizing our bodies and brains with genetic material from the GMO corn products we were eating. They could then take over control of our brains and our bodies.

“Hey I have a movie idea and was wondering if you would like to produce it

Go [So] Monsanto corn alien gods have invaded the earth and have sent billions of space alien eggs to colonize our planet…

More to come
I need your phone number btw and mine is 509 838 7443. The plan is to use as much DIY as possible in making like from scriptures tec. Paper mache r dig costume design. Free paint form incinerator. Gotta couple of people that know how to work with scrap metals. And a theatre friend knows set design and costume design and got other ideas including who I want to write the male dialogue but need full staff to help put this all together.


I can only be creator so we would need male and female copywriters and staff people of all kinds

Message me your phone number but also call and leave is your phone number on my answering machine because my friend will be taking away my I access to Facebook and I don’t have caller ID or voicemail. Just old fashioned phone with answering machine. And I screen phone calls. Please leav area code with phone number thank you”

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

Highlights of "My Schizophrenic Episode" with Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

Not rated.

If you didn’t have time for the full-length video, here’s a shorter version with highlights that you can watch! On December 14th of 2019, Myra Sue shared her story about her schizophrenic episode or actual spy operation that she endured. She explained how she was civil rights minded, fought for the privacy rights of all people on the planet, was fighting for the rights of all women, and believed in the first amendment right of all U.S. American citizens (and ideally noncitizens) to associate freely, including identifying as a Communist or a Wiccan. Meanwhile, she heard voices and thought others were trying to violate her rights and put her through psychological torture.

She also shared her life story, including a strange church she went to as a child, working at McDonald’s, opening a leftist bookstore, attending college, writing for an underground paper called “The Finger”, making art from junk, and more.

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The Privacy Invasion Collection

"My Schizophrenic Episode" with Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

Full length version with Q&A

Featuring Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin and Orion Moon. Filmed by Karl Patterson of Patterson Productions. Not Rated.

Note: There is about 20 seconds of a blank screen before the video begins. This video has not yet been edited.

“The voices may have exaggerated my speaking skills and star power, but I’ve been told I was very brave to speak about my schizophrenic episode or spy operation. I may take speech and acting classes in the future to help me with this multi-media blog that I’ll be working on more with my new partner in crime, Orion Moon.

Categories
The Privacy Invasion Collection

Sometimes Privacy Invasion is Real!

By Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

The sign says “Send police! Stop stunt!” It is a Myra Sue original from when I lived at the Couer d’Alene Plaza apartment complex in Spokane, Washington. Here I am pictured outside the local shop Boo Radley’s, located next to the apartment complex. The inside of my apartment was plastered with signs, in a hope that someone who was invited to participate in an alleged spy operation , would see the signs on a remote screen and call the police to end  what I called the “Privacy Invasion Stunt.” I just recently added the anarchy symbols to the sign prior to my recent photo shoot. Most of the art work and signs from my apartment did not survive. They were left behind or later damaged by moisture in my parent’s storage. Apparently none of my alleged spies were brave enough or willing to rat out the rest of my alleged spies. One of my neighbors was very happy to see me get evicted.

Sometimes privacy invasion is a figment of our imagination, and sometimes it’s real. Although I’ve been diagnosed with schizophrenia, I still to this day believe it’s possible that I was really spied on, and I felt that I was at high risk for a real spy operation.

Here I am outside my old apartment complex, the Couer d’Alene Plaza apartments.
I was evicted in January, 2016 due to having a hoarding disorder and my apartment being overgrown with books, huge art projects made from “junk”, left-over packaging, and random paperwork I’d saved over the years.

Categories
The Privacy Invasion Collection

Myra Sue Has Worn Many Hats!

Article by Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

A few of my alleged spies wanted to know if I had Multiple Personality Disorder. It wasn’t clear right away why they were testing me for this, but  it became evident with time that they each remembered me differently and were apparently taking notes. Well, I have (just like most people) worn different hats in life – as I have functioned in different roles –  such as mother, co-worker, supervisor, student, client, patient, wife, girlfriend, loner, friend, bookstore owner, thinker, activist, shut-in, party girl, feminist, Christian, agnostic, atheist, heretic, apostate & writer. I also once played pretend at being Carrie Brownstein, and like to sometimes think of myself as a wannabe Brownstein!

Categories
The Privacy Invasion Collection

The One With All the Star Power!

Article by Myra Sue St. Clair Baldwin

A few of the voices I heard in my apartment in the fall and winter of 2015 before becoming homeless exclaimed that I was “The one with all the star power!” and that I was “a real capable actress”. I didn’t realize at the time that the phrase “one with star power” is often used as an insult that means someone is being disingenuous.

Although the voices were often cruel, they did inspire me to want to be an actress, which was something I wanted to be when I was a child. When I became homeless, I dreamt of becoming a paid actress for The Spokane Civic Theatre, and looked up their upcoming plays on their website. I didn’t realize that actors for The Spokane Civic Theatre actually VOLUNTEER their time.

Here I am shown above with a copy of “A Streetcar Named Desire,” a play they were planning to show at the Spokane Civic Theatre a few years ago. I didn’t know if the women’s shelter would let me stay out late for rehearsals, and I didn’t know if I really had enough long-term energy to be an actress. I kinda thought being an actress might actually be energizing, at least for a while anyway. Maybe I’ll just do a video shoot with a friend sometime and perform short skits, and see if the voices were right about my potential as a bad-ass celebrity. I’d prefer being a celebrity for the Independent Film Channel or perhaps Netflix. Something edgy like the show “Orange is the New Black”!